Learning to Reign with Paula Demontigny Howard
The odds of two people sharing the same birthday are about 1 in 365. I would like to say it is fate that I had the privilege of meeting at my kid’s daycare an amazing woman who I like to call my delivery twin as we had our first sons on the same day, in the same year, in the same hospital and at almost the same time. She is a professional hairstylist and mother of two boys. I recently had the opportunity to sit down with her for coffee and discuss her journey as a working mother.
Despite the hours she often needs to work, Paula credits her family for giving her the motivation and encouragement she needs to stay focused and never give up on her passion. In our conversation, Paula revealed how she is able to stay on top of her ever-growing list of responsibilities and manage her work life and home life.
Here are insightful snippets from our conversations;
Q: What is your weekly pocket of sunshine? How do you refresh and relax and just take care of yourself weekly?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
I would say lately, I’ve been taking the time to do one boot camp exercise class weekly. I make sure that I get to at least once a week. Ideally, I would like to go more, but that’s what I can do now. Honestly, I would just say even the time spent with some of the people I work with, sharing stories and relating to them. I don’t have a lot of time for myself. I’m hoping to make more time in the future. It’s hard. Another is getting enough sleep. That’s huge for me, about six hours straight. My bed lately has been from 9:30 pm to 10:00 pm, but I can sometimes do 11:00 pm at the latest. Coffee in the morning, hopefully before anyone wakes up. I can get one coffee before anyone else wakes up; I love that.
Q: What kind of boot camp?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
I go to The Fix. It’s a gym. I believe it’s on Lawrence Street, just kind of in the warehouse district. It’s an amazing group. Sometimes there are gentlemen there, but usually, it’s just ladies of all ages from their early 20s, sometimes even late teens into their 60s. It’s just a high-intensity workout in that the coordinator runs you through different stations. It’s hard, but I feel like a million bucks after I do it.
Q: How did you decide to become a business owner?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
I think I was pregnant with my first son Sam and just kind of based on my experience working in the salons, I didn’t feel there was a good work-life balance. I felt it was always last-minute staff meetings and expectations of these people with families that just weren’t realistic. I wanted to create a place that had more work-life balance. I wouldn’t be calling last-minute meetings, and I would be respectful of their home life. It’s always just been ladies, and now I have an amazing team of women. All are different in their ways; they have a key, rent their space, and come and go as they please, and it’s just kind of mutual respect that way. Whereas before, I worked at places where I might not have a key. I got told when I had to be there. I had to drop everything to be at a staff meeting. There was just more expectation that way.
Q: How did you structure your salon to be very different from how rigid your previous working experience was?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
To start with, I would say that I am more trusting, and I focus on mutual respect. That’s like, “Here’s your key. You work when you need to.” Especially for the full-time renters, if they wanted to come in on a Sunday because that worked for them, come in on a Sunday. You do you. I’m not going to micromanage. The money goes directly to them. All they do is pay rent. I’ve just changed a few things, but their colour and all the other supplies they supply themselves. I supply the shampoo and the shampoo station, and the space. They supply all their tools. They’re their bosses. If a client has a problem with their hair, that’s their client, so they handle it. They deal with everything themselves. That’s how I set it up. For them to be their business owner. I just provide the space. I don’t want to be managing relationships. I wanted a mature staff, and if there’s an issue that they can’t resolve, then they’ll come to me. Decide if you want to come in at 8:00 am. I will not tell you what you can or cannot do. That’s what I mean by that work-life balance as well.
Q: How long have you been in business?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
We bought the house eight years ago, then opened the business by May 5th of the same year, because it was Cinco de Mayo. In 2015. I don’t know why I remember that, but I just do. That was our first day, and we had not finished renovating the upstairs portion of the salon. It’s this beautiful old character house. We were renovating it, and we opened the main floor first and then for the upstairs, we opened it maybe half a year later.
Q: When you decided to do this, how was the initial conversation with your husband?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
Looking back at it now, I think it’s crazy because Sam was just about five months old when we bought the house and started renovating it. The idea was that people would often lease a space, and the money would go to whoever you’re leasing the space from. And my thought was, well, why wouldn’t we buy the house and then pay the mortgage and then regardless of what the salon is making, it’s an investment? He was supportive, and he helped me. It’s hard to get a commercial loan, your first commercial loan, so we brought in his good friend from Lumsden, and so we are equal partners on the house. he owns half of the house, and we own half of the house, but then Ryan and I own the salon. The setup is, so the salon covers all the bills for the house. he was kind of like a silent partner. I mean, now I feel we’ve probably, now that we’re more established, they might have given us the loan or now that we’ve had a business, but it’s tough to get that initial investment. A lot of work went into a business plan. It was more than I expected. I thought they would be like, “Oh, here you go. Exactly. “Here, take this.” No, it wasn’t like that. It was like, “We’re going to need a full business plan.” it was intense, but now when I look back, wow, that was a lot of work, and it was hard.
Q: Does he play any part in the ownership or any role in the business?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
He does, and sometimes if I need him to do things. I would say that if there’s someone, I can get to do it in the last eight years, I try to do that instead because his job is stressful and intense. I feel it’s better for our relationship if I can outsource the work because I don’t want to put that extra pressure on him. He’s there. If I need him, he will come, but I pick and choose when to do that. Over Christmas break, I asked him to come snow blow the back of the salon because we have a massive park that saves me $500. Snow removal is a huge expense, and I have someone that does the sidewalks regularly, but just those types of things, I’ll ask for favours that way, and he’s good about it.
Q: What is the greatest obstacle you faced in achieving the success you have, and how did you overcome it?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
I think there are two things, and one of which I’m still experiencing is small children. It’s tough to manage the time. Just figuring out that balance because I don’t feel I put in enough hours right now. I feel the salon is good, but it could be great, and I just haven’t had that time because raising two children, it’s a lot of work, and my work is more flexible than Ryan’s. If it comes to hours of, “Oh, you need to pick up the kids,” I can do that more easily. I sometimes have to sacrifice that, if that makes sense to you.
The second I would just say is a team member, and their personality can throw everything off. Nowadays, I’m very selective now. I’d rather not have the money of renting a chair and have a positive person. I’m sure you can relate to that too because if someone has a toxic personality, everything’s going to be off-kilter. That’s one piece of advice I would give anyone with a business is really ask the questions. What type of person are you adding to your team? Well, not that they’ll necessarily tell you, but look for a positive person that’s going to look at the half full, not the half empty, and that kind of stuff. I feel even our clients can feel it when things are off. It just throws off the entire energy, and people feel that. I remember a time when I would come into the salon, and I would almost be scared of this one girl because her energy was so off, and I thought, “Well, this is ridiculous. This is my space. I should feel happy and safe here.”
Q: How did you end that relationship?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
That stylist ended up leaving because the rent went up, and she didn’t feel she could afford it. And then another time we were working through it, another toxic stylist decided to leave and go out on their own, it kind of just happened organically. I didn’t have to…But it’s funny, once she was gone, we haven’t had any, it’s been night and day. It just takes one. It’s managing relationships, and that’s what I didn’t ever want to have to do. I just want everyone to be adults and professional. I don’t want to have to say, “Oh, this person said this or this.” I want people to be mature and sort out their own conflicts. Sometimes I have to get involved, but I prefer not to.
Q: How do you handle the interpersonal relationships between the stylists?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
Some of us share rooms, but the way that I do that is usually sharing rooms with someone that they’re going to get along with. Personalities that will blend well, it’s just like anything else. When you spend a lot of time with someone, sometimes they’re going to get on your nerves. But overall, I can’t express how much our salon is getting along right now. It’s good. When everyone’s there, it will be nine of us. Only five or six of us are full-time; the others either have young children or just get back to work after mat leaves.
Q: I noticed that the Reign Hair Studio doesn’t do a lot of advertising or even social media updates. How are you able to get clients?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
We used to have a website, and I decided to get rid of it just because of updating it and the cost. All the girls working at the salon have been doing hair for 15 years, so they all have established clientele. Some of them don’t even take new clients, and the new clients that they do take, they’ll only take by referral. The reason that we don’t advertise is that we don’t need to. Well, it’s been since I graduated from hair school in ’99, right? Some of us have been doing hair for 20-plus years, and I think two of the stylists, maybe 25 and one 30. You’re just established like that when you’ve been doing it that long. And when you do want to take on new clients, you can just take on the odd referral. I don’t put much into that cost because it isn’t necessary. It’s just many years behind the chair, and there are peaks and valleys. Sometimes where you’re like, “Oh, why am I not booked?” But for me, if I take on too many clients, then I don’t get time for my family. I have some clients that have been seeing me for 20 years. I never want them not to be able to get in to see me, right? So it’s just finding that balance.
Q: What is your greatest influence in business?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
I think it’s just the people I surround myself with and admire the women I work with; they’re awesome. It’s funny being a hairstylist and not having gone to university. I remember starting out in my younger years, and people would be like, “Oh, what are you going to do after this? Are you just going to do hair?” That kind of a thing. And I thought, well, it always kind of struck me because I thought, “Well, that’s kind of insulting. I like my job.”. Women hairstylists, especially these women that have been doing it for so long, it’s hard work, and they grind it out, and they’re just boss babes.
They must be, sometimes, counsellors. They have to be good at their job, they have to put the hours in, and I’m just amazed by them. I just like surrounding myself with powerful girls who succeed at their work. It’s not always easy to work, but they all love it. If you surround yourself with that, it’s very motivating.
Q: What about books, movies, or a previous hairstylist you’ve worked with that? What plays a huge role in how you currently style hair?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
I went to hair school in Regina, and I’ve kind of worked at all kinds of different salons. I worked at a cool salon in my 20s. We all worked hard, and we partied hard. And back in those days, my life was hair. I would go to Chicago, Toronto, and hair shows. We would travel, and we would compete. I won two awards in the province for men’s cutting back in the day. It was just that I lived and breathed it, and then it evolved. I ensure I am constantly learning. I did a balayage class, a certain type of colour technique, and just keeping myself up to date because a lot has changed in the last 20 years with hair. So now and then, we’ll do a class. And with social media now, it’s amazing for us because we don’t have to go anywhere to take a class. You can watch something right online. I do a lot of that. I watch many videos online, and then I don’t even have to pay for them, right? I stay current by watching what’s in, and the people I surround myself with. I will say that life experience is a key influence because you have many daily conversations with different people. I feel like that whole bartender thing, and people will open up and tell me everything. I’ve learned so much through the stories from people right in my chair. I feel it’s given me a better understanding of human and human relations. I do it every single day of my life. It’s a good perspective.
Q: What is the biggest adjustment you’ve had to make in your personal life to support your professional life?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
Biggest adjustment. Well, I can no longer just on a limb say, “Oh, I’ll stay late for you and colour your hair.” I have not only my husband but, more importantly, the two little guys where it’s, no, I’m on their schedule. I’m not able to be as flexible as I once was. I wouldn’t necessarily say that’s a bad thing because it gives me some boundaries otherwise, I could be at the salon till 9:00 every night.” I would say it’s just been hard even with Andrew in kindergarten because at least two, sometimes three days a week, I would have to be done work by 3:00 to get to him, and for sure, in case I’m running late a little bit by 3:30. It’s just that balance of being able to pick them up. Clients want the evenings and Saturdays, but as your kids get older, that’s harder to do. I don’t want to be working evenings and Saturdays all the time.
Q: Do you have a piece of advice to give to another mother on a similar journey?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
When I was deciding whether or not to do the salon, I had a lot of outside feedback, whether it be from some family or friends. “Why would you do that to yourself? Open a business when you have a baby. Why don’t you just have a chair at your house?” or do what they wanted for me. I decided to open the salon because I knew my kids would grow up one day, and being a hairstylist is who I am. And it’ll always be a part of me, and they’re going to grow up, and they’re going to have their own lives. I didn’t want to lose my clientele and everything I had worked for up until that point. Even with maternity, I lost some clients. I would just say, you can have it all. It’s not easy, but don’t give up and don’t give up on what your dream or your passion is. You can be a good mom and still have those things for yourself. Yes, and as much as it pains us to think that they will go one day, they will go, and you will carry on. And for me, if I were to let go of all my clients or I don’t even know what I would do once they were grown, I don’t know. I don’t know what I would do.
Q: What would you do all day if the kids went to school and then you were home all day? Did you ever think about being a stay-at-home mom?
Paula Demontigny Howard:
One thing I will say about stay-at-home moms is that I have huge admiration for them because I was home during Covid and found it hard. I need a little external interaction to feel like myself behind my chair. If you’re at home, there’s more pressure on you to do more, to cook more. And with mad respect for the stay-at-home moms, I knew it wasn’t for me. It’s a lot of work. There’s even more pressure. For me, it just wasn’t the right fit. I just enjoy being around people too much. I just love that connection; I wouldn’t say I’m an introvert. I’m a bit of both, but I don’t like being in big crowds I like the one-on-one connection or the time with the girls at the salon. Don’t give up your passion, feeling that’s what you must do to be a good mom. It might not always be easy through the years, but they will grow up, and you can do it. You can have both.
With a charming location in downtown Regina, Reign Hair Studio occupies a beautiful character house and is home to amazing hairstylists with years of experience. For Paula, being an entrepreneur and running her business has allowed her the flexibility of working around her motherly duties while still being able to express herself with creative artistry in the hair industry. If you need a stylist, try getting a referral to sit in the chairs of any of the amazing ladies at Reign Hair Studio, trust me your hair will be in good hands.
